I don’t think have been this down in a long time, like my meds aren’t working and all I want to do is just stay in bed and cry. Like its so hard coming to work or going around like I’m good but I can’t even do it anymore and all the drinking isn’t helping anymore. I feel so weak and tired. For a second there I thought I was doing much better. I felt a momentum change, my heart was filled with joy but all of a sudden now I’m down again, filled with rage.I’ve punched the wall several times today from anger, my heart is filled with despair. I just want to getaway from everything, I work all time but I don’t see anything from it. I feel like such a waste and an under achiever, I overload myself with work not to think but just get up and work takes so much away from me. I don’t know what is wrong. I’m a walking cry for help, I’m such a lost soul and misguided sheep. I’m so lost and misguided; I’m walking cry for help. I’m such a lost soul.